My Journey To Becoming A Coach

One morning sitting out in a grass patch of land in Northern Ontario, I had to come to terms that the story I was living was no longer serving me. And I knew that it was entirely up to me - 100 percent my responsibility - to change it.

I had recently turned 40, and thought that I had everything our dominant culture had taught me about success. I had a successful career in a fast paced growing industry. I was married. I had two active teenagers, and my own condo apartment in the heart of a bustling city. And a very busy family and social life.

Instead of being satisfied and feeling fulfilled, I was burned-out, and frustrated with the life story I was living in.

“Was this it, for me?” 

I began to second guess everything from my relationships, to my work, and even who I was being.

I was waking up to the idea that my life wasn’t working and if I wanted something to change I had to stop waiting for life to happen and take full responsibility to write the next chapter to my story. So began my journey of radical self-discovery. 

I began to look at what I had in my life by asking myself some serious questions.  

“Where did I experience fulfillment?”

“Where did I experience aliveness or wholeness?”

“What was truly important to me?”

“What was holding me back?”

“What was I waiting for?”

“Where was I wasting my energy, emotion, and time?”

“What did I learn from my first forty years, that I could carry into the rest of my life?”

“Where was I living or not living with purpose?”

“What was I longing for?”

I had leaned into some of my closest friends, family and mentors. I had found a therapist to work with and signed up for a leadership program that promised life transformative results. I went back to the many books I had collected on music, religion, culture, social justice, and personal development in search of the answers to my questions. I journal everyday, pages at a time, reflecting on my peak experiences and where I fell short of living my fullest sense of self. I took a hard look at my career as a whole. I took an audit of the activities I was doing and the passion projects I hadn’t started. I had also looked closely at my core values, discerning the ones I was living from those I was compromising. 

I discovered that the life I was living no longer served me because I wasn’t living my fullest expression of my authentic self. I was busy doing what I felt society expected of me instead of living inspired by what was emerging from within. In other words, I wasn’t choosing my life. I wasn’t making choices aligned with my core values, aspirations and purpose. I wasn’t consciously choosing where I wanted to serve and be a servant to change. 

I had to come to terms that I was working in an industry that I had zero passion for. My marriage was at its end. I was beginning to feel out of touch with my children as they were finding themselves in their teenage years. And many of the relationships I was holding onto no longer fed me the kind of love and connection I really wanted.

It was then I realized that, “Manifesting my story of a life fulfilled has to become a life-sized occupation.” That if I truly wanted to be fulfilled in life meant that I had to change my relationship with everything in my life. And that life is a constant flow of choice. And it was in these small cognitive and somatic shifts my life started to change - and it’s still changing. And it is my experience of these shifts, life transforming, I want for others to experience, who also are living unfulfilled, disconnected, passionless lives. 

What’s the point to this life, if you’re not living it to its fullest? What’s the point if you keep your deepest longings, passions, and creative inspirations tucked away where no one will see it? What’s the point of chasing success if it comes at the cost of other things in your life? When will you take responsibility for the choices you’re making for yourself, others and the whole?

I became a coach because I desire to inspire the same transformation in others. I want to awaken others to who they truly are. Guide them towards a life they’ll find has greater purpose, meaning and fulfillment. To become conscious of the array of choices they have in front of them. 

I find it deeply fulfilling now when the people I work with open themselves to the fullest expression of their humanity. Your transformation is a rite of passage, if you choose it.

I want that for you.